Our Complete Script

Here is our script, describing each section and detailing what will happen in each section.

Throughout song: Shots of performance (both single members + whole band/party) shown throughout the narrative.

Intro: Typical “Indie Kid” walks down suburban street smiling. When drums kick in, he gets pushed out the way by chav, the “Charming Man” of the title. When the chav is not in shot the camera effect is in an “80s vintage” style, when he appears the camera returns to normal.

A punctured bicycle
On a hillside desolate
Will nature make a man of me yet ?

The chav rides a moped down a hill to meet his friend.

When in this charming car
This charming man
Why pamper life's complexity
When the leather runs smooth
On the passenger seat

Through these lines he is in a old, “banger” style car with his friend, “raving” and looking like a general idiot.

I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"

Chav at his house with friend. Posters of various “gangsta rappers” (2Pac, Eminem, 50 Cent etc.) adorn the wall. He is asking is friend what shirt to wear, showing 2 clearly awful t-shirts. The friend cannot choose either.

A jumped up pantry boy
Who never knew his place
He said "return the ring"
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things

Chav goes to a small corner shop and tries to steal a typical “chav” item (White Lightning?), but is caught easily by the shopkeeper and is chased away.

I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said "It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care"
Na, na-na, na-na, na-na, this charming man ...
Na, na-na, na-na, na-na, this charming man ...

Chav sees a status on Facebook from “Indie McMorrisey”, saying something about a party. He then goes to the bathroom and grooms himself, trying to make himself look good. This of course fails, but he still thinks he’s God’s gift anyway.

A jumped up pantry boy
Who never knew his place
He said "return the ring"
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things

Goes to the party with his mate, the band are performing at the party. Chav looks in through the window then rings the doorbell/knocks on the door. The door is opened by the same guy he pushed over at the start of the video. The mate gets in but Chav gets rejected.

Outro: Slow tracking shot of Chav walking away glumly and band finishing performance